3 Things I GET To Be During The Corona Virus Outbreak…(and so do you)

I have been trying to be mindful, for my own health and sanity, to think of this whole thing as not just tragedy, but as an opportunity. I do not mean in any way to minimize the devastating loss already being experienced and yet to come. Just, for me, this way of thinking helps me. And I hope that if you are not already thinking about the things you get to be during all of this craziness, you will be after this.

1. I get to be creative.

And so do you.

Over the last few weeks, I have been existing in constant creative mode. I have gotten to write, so much. I have gotten to create content and prepare things in different formats. I have gotten to make material with different goals and think through how to tie them one to another so that they present a unified message. I have really loved doing this work.

I have heard from others in different industries that they are experiencing this as well. Things that for years we have thought, “It’d be so much better if we….” are now things that are being tried. Without a reason, without a catalyst, I think many of us or many industries have been relying on what is most comfortable.

Even personally, people have told me about how they are able to make things work with their families or socially, ways they are being pressed to think of how to accomplish goals they’ve had, but kept on the back burner.

Now we get to innovate! Now we get to create! Now we get to try things! Now we get to fail at stuff and then try different things! We are in an unprecedented grace period where people will look at the things we try and either say “Wow! I want to try that too!” Or “Wow! That totally bombed. But I bombed at something, too, so I get it. What are you going to try next?” People are feeling far kinder with one another, far more sympathetic to the ways those around us are trying their best.

If ever there was a time to try, to be creative, to think out of the box, this is it!

2. I get to be healthy.

And so do you.

I had JUST set up a new health and fitness plan for my life. I had gone to the gym exactly 2 times when everything started to shut down. I don’t have a home gym. But you know what I do have? A sidewalk that is still open currently. And a theraband. And about 500 online fitness people posting fitness challenges. And 2 kids that NEED to be taken on walks and bike rides and anything that will burn off some energy and give them a change of scenery.

Also, I am surrounded by people who are thinking of the health and well being of others. I am thinking of the health and well being of others. People are changing the game in how they interact with one another so that we don’t pass germs around. But also, companies are changing their policies so that their employees can actually stay home when they are sick. They are reevaluating how their policies and their practices are harmful not just to their bottom line, but to society.

And, currently, society has become increasingly comfortable and caring towards mental health. I am prayerfully hopeful that the voices who have been leading the charge in encouraging us to recognize anxiety, to deal with our stress, and to get help for our minds, will be vocal in this area. This is a time to turn around technology from a thing which breeds anxiety by, oh back up to number 1, creating new resources through technology. This creates opportunity to make mental health care MORE accessible, to make social media MORE encouraging and positive, to make us more aware of the needs we have in this area.

If there was a time to focus on improving my health and the health of my loved ones, this is it.

3. I get to be human.

And so do you.

And NO, I am not saying this so then I can write a paragraph about how I get to laze around and not shower and only eat whatever I want. (Though, those days do exist.)

People are getting married in sweet, intimate settings. Babies being born. New opportunities are presenting themselves to people. People are hiking and biking and playing games that make them laugh. All these things make people happy. And they get to be happy. And so do I. And so do you.

But I can also struggle with the concern that because I speak so much about hope and freedom, that when things get worse, and they will, the numbers will go up, the news will get darker, that I feel the pressure to only tap into positivity. I am giving myself permission, and giving you permission, too, to mourn and grieve as the situation demands.

I know people who have had big momentous life goals canceled. I’ve felt that. I get to say, “It stinks that things are not going according to my plan. It stinks that things I’ve looked forward to for a very long time aren’t going to happen.” People have lost jobs. They get to feel disappointment. I get to feel disappointment. So do you.

I can sing all kinds of songs and enjoy a drive with the windows down.

I can have allergies. And so can my son.

I can cook new things and I can declare cereal for dinner nights.

I can send my kids to their room, outside, or to snuggle up and watch a movie.

I can clean my whole house because cleaning feels good. I can also clean the side of the room which is visible in the video call. Because having everyone home all the time makes the messes happen faster.

I can experience all the variety of emotions and experiences that are available to me as a human. And so can you.

I was talking with someone this week about how in the Bible, the psalms can really wear me out, because one psalm is happy, and the next is sad. Then comes a psalm declaring victory followed by one begging God to protect him from his enemies. Finally, a worshipful “good job, God” psalm closes out the cycle and it all starts back from the top with another happy psalm. I used to think that David was just really dramatic. Now I wonder if he wasn’t just in a stressful chaotic situation and experiencing it and expressing it as a human. Just being honest.

So those are the 3 things I get to be.

What are 3 things you get to be?

Wrestling To Serve

I am struggling for words lately.

I know, I know, anyone who reads that and knows me has just scoffed.

But honestly, over the past week or so it is like I have watched so many things take place and been involved in the most incredible conversations and circumstances that I am having trouble processing them. Generally, my mind functions like this…experience happens > mind process> story comes out. But lately, it is operating like this…experience happens>experience happens>experience happens>experiences hurl themselves on the dogpile in the middle of my mind>I sit and stare at them and go, “woah.”

It has become apparent that I need to just pick up an experience or two, and brush them off and set them down in their own space, before my mind becomes a giant junk heap and breaks down. Welcome to Sarah’s brain.

In that hope, here is one such story.

Yesterday afternoon I sat in a meeting where we discussed serving and volunteering. We talked about the vision of children’s ministry and the mission of the church. We identified gaps and talked about solutions. It was an incredibly helpful meeting. As we talked, I had this thought.

Serving is not the penalty we pay in order to gain social currency. Serving is an act of worship. It is a means of grace.

There. This is not actually the story I am trying to pick out of the dogpile. It is just the thought that got stuck to the side of it in the mess.

Here is the actual story.

Last night my kids went to their first practice at a new wrestling club preparing to learn to new styles of wrestling. I have seen the kids from this club out at other wrestling events. I watched hand after hand get raised at the high school level from kids who’ve come out of this club and thought, “Dude, those kids have been trained well.”

At the end of her last meet, Molly was frustrated. She wants to be better. She is willing to put in the work. She is willing to be challenged. Molly is a good little wrestler. Molly’s problem is she lacks confidence. She doesn’t like to be in front of a crowd. She is shy when she meets new people. In matches, she doesn’t take shots that are wide open to her because what if she doesn’t do them perfectly?

Where Frank needs to grow as a wrestler, is that he needs to be faster. Where Frank needs to grow as a student, is that he needs to be faster. Where Frank needs to grow as a room picker upper or a come here-er or a go get that-er, is he needs to be faster.

Both are old enough now and interested enough that we wanted to put them in wrestling off-season.

Kermit and I had a little date to the district match of another district a few weeks ago and I asked him about the kids from this club who were winning, winning, winning. I also watched kids from opposing schools walk around together, leave their school stands to go high five and hug kids from opposing teams. The common factor? They all go to this club, Shenandoah Valley Wrestling Club. That was the first night I’d noticed it, but I believe Kermit has been watching it for some time now.

The highest value we see in Fort’s wrestling program is not a wrestling goal. It is a personal one. Fort wrestling, from youth through high school and past graduation, is a family. We love Fort. We love the VCA. We want our kids to enjoy wrestling and enjoy their teammates. We have watched good wrestlers burn out by the time they’re 10 because they have been pushed at skills and they love winning, but that first loss, that second loss, it cracks them because drilling was not built on a solid foundation of love of the sport and the encouragement of a team that loves them.

Last night at SVWC, the coaches introduced the wrestlers to themselves, the club, and Greco and freestyle wrestling rules. They talked about how these two styles will help you in folk because it will make you faster. Well, yes sir, I thought. This is the correct thing my kid needs to learn. Frank nodded along as he listened. Molly listened intently as well, but I watched her sit stiffly, uncomfortably, in a new room with new people. They warmed up and they began learning some moves.

Molly’s partner ran off the mat to fix his socks, and I watched her get frustrated that she was missing that practice moment. A coach found her and let her work with him, which is always a silly look with Molly, like a lion letting a mouse wrestle it. A good little mouse, but still…

When her partner made his way back on the mat, they’d moved to the next move that built off the previous one. And because he was off the mat for a minute, Molly tried to help him make up for lost time, but the piece was missing. I looked around to see if that coach would come back. As my eyes went around the crowded mat, I saw that nearby there were two wrestlers, most likely 8th graders, watching Molly and her partner. They started to chuckle. They said something to one another and laughed again. It was clear they’d noticed it wasn’t working.

These two wrestlers were 1) clearly good, 2) clearly have been in the club for awhile, and 3) clearly 8th grade boys. I don’t know if you know 8th grade boys, but they are…uh….8th grade boys. I was a little nervous.

And then they stopped what they were doing, stepped over to Molly and her partner and said, “Hang on, hang on. You’re not doing this right, look at us.” They demonstrated the move. Then they told Molly and her partner to try again. Molly and the other kid did. Wrong again. The two bigger boys pulled the two of them apart, and then each took one of them and worked the move with them individually. They put them back together and Molly and her partner were back on track. The two other boys went back to their circle and practice went on.

Well, dang. Those two boys could have rolled their eyes and moved on, but instead they saw a need, stopped, and met the need without being directed to do so. When we talk as a church staff about creating a culture which values serving, this is what we’re talking about. That moment on the mat, it was not evidence of good home training (though it could be the case). It was not evidence of a particularly rare moral superiority that these two kids possess (though that could be the case.) It is evidence of a culture in a group of caring for all, no matter the individual’s preferences or the perceived value of the one in need.

When I came home and told Kermit how practice went, I told him about how each kid did, and then I told him about that moment. He said, “That’s why I wanted them to be at SVWC. They’re a family. Like Fort.”

I love my job. I love wrestling. I love people who serve. I have a hundred experiences in my head this week all trying to turn into stories but they are so tangled up it’s hard to keep them straight. But this is the story from yesterday.

Serving others isn’t an obligation. It is the privilege of being part of a family.

And it may be the greatest form of welcome we can offer.